I recently was talking to a friend about moving next semester. Just for some context, I live about a 25 minute bus ride away from campus. But realistically, that means leaving about 40 minutes before my class starts to catch the bus schedule.

I was pretty adamant on moving. It just takes too long to get to campus and after a full day of classes, sometimes I just want to be back home as soon as I can. I also have some pretty nasty motion sickness, so I can’t scroll on my phone for long without gambling with nausea. I could also could really be using that hour 30 doing something else.

But one day, on the ride home, I realized it actually wasn’t that bad.

The stop in front of my apartment is the start of the line, which means I almost always get a window seat. The bus is still mostly empty. And that’s what made me realize — I might actually miss this if I move.

I might miss sitting by the window on a sunny afternoon, squinting as the light pours in, watching the neighborhoods roll past.

I might miss those early mornings. Silently fighting my heavy eyelids, listening to some dance music that might keep me awake.

I might actually miss the late nights heading home, catching my reflection in the dark window and also spying on other people as well.

I might miss pretending to scroll on Pinterest or skim the news while actually eavesdropping on someone’s conversation two seats away. Hearing "yeah, yeah" or "omg" on repeat.

I might miss the way the bus demands nothing from me. I don’t have to decide anything or think about anything. I just sit there and watch as the world blurs on by.

So, yeah, I might actually miss it. Because even though it often feels like wasted time -- like I’m being forced into stillness -- it’s also one of the only pockets in my day where I slow down. A little bored. A little restless. But living in the present. And I think boredom is probably more important than I let myself admit.

But would I choose the bus ride over the anxious wait of a spotty bus schedule and the worry of being late to class?

Over the occasional spider crawling a little too close to my seat? Or the random guy who sits next to me and starts chatting to me about something to this day I'm still unsure about?

Probably not.

♒︎.♒︎.♒︎.

10.17.25 | 3:25pm | taken from my journal

The human experience is cramming into a bus like sardines